Expectations are an easy trap to fall into. With every thing we do in life, we often start with an expectation of the end result. We might also have expectations about the way things will happen and what the process looks like getting to that expected end. We define in our minds a single outcome that would be acceptable and often a single way to get to that outcome. Focusing on only one “acceptable” path though can be a major source of frustration and disappointment, even if we ultimately achieve the same end result. In changing our mindset to accomplishing a task rather than the specific way it’s accomplished, we begin living without expectation.
When we approach life with expectations about how things will play out, we miss the beauty of how they actually happen. We miss all the things along the way that we closed our minds to because we were so set on seeing just one thing in particular. There’s a huge sense of accomplishment we can feel if we set the goal, for example, to go for a run today rather than insisting on going for a five mile run. There’s nothing wrong with setting goals and pushing ourselves, and in fact, I’m a big proponent of that. The difference between this and expectations is how we respond to or feel when we fall short of that end result we were striving for. I used to have an image in my mind of how every endeavor I embarked upon would turn out and if that didn’t happen, I was utterly disappointed. It took me until just the last few years to change my perspective and see the value in living without expectation. I began by noticing the peace and joy I experienced just by keeping an open mind. The more pleasant surprises I experienced, the more I connected it to not having expectations. I noticed that by having no expectations of the end result or what I would encounter along the way, I found tremendous beauty and joy in my experiences.
There are times we have legitimate expectations though. If we paint the walls in our house a particular color that appealed to us and it doesn’t look the way we expected it to, that would be very disappointing. But we have plenty of life experiences that we impose unnecessary expectations on that actually limit our ability to enjoy that experience. Living without expectation and being open to letting things unfold as they do opens us up to fully experiencing life and the fulfillment that can bring.
See related posts: Being Present, Perception is Everything, Transcending Limiting Beliefs
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